Once upon a time, back in the summer of 1988, a boy and a girl met on a blind date. The boy took the girl back to his house to enjoy some pizza and watch a movie on VHS. It was a warm quiet evening. As they approached the house, the boy’s mother could be seen through the screen door. She was ironing clothes.
The girl noticed that the woman was wearing a pair of pink and white high top Reebok aerobic shoes. The kind with the double velcro straps at the top. The girl had never seen a pair that color before. She didn’t know who the woman was, but she thought to herself that if it happened to be the boy’s mother she was now armed with an icebreaker, “I love your shoes. Where did you get them from?”
Before the couple could step foot on the porch, the boy’s mother stopped them in their tracks.
“Where do you think you’re going,” said the mother to her son.
“We’re coming in to watch a movie,” he replied.
“Oh no you’re not. You’re not bringing that [expletive] in my house. You got a girlfriend, or did you forget.” She shifted her gaze from the porch to her task at hand. The boy’s mother had blown his cover and since he was in no mood to fight with her he retreated.
He was embarrassed but hardly shocked by his mother’s obstinance and choice of words. Trying to save face, the boy turned to the girl on the porch.
“So what do you want to do?”
“Take me home,” she said emphatically.
A little less than two years later on June 2, 1990 the boy and the girl were married.